Do women have to "develop"?

Of course you need to develop, but let's talk about how we see this development. Now it is so fashionable. If you do not develop, do not go on training, seminars, not read the book - you degradiruesh. And in many respects it is certainly correct. Fashion is good, better than smoking and alcohol. So cool, all tend to the development, growth. That's just women often do it once severely and uncompromisingly. Still others are actively being dragged somewhere.

Austerities some incredible - then get up at four in the morning, then pour ice water, then do not want to and do not ask, you serve all around. Continual improvement of itself in all directions, as though now live such as it is, can not be absolutely, categorically. As if we are now unfit for life as if today - error.

Most visitors to workshops, seminars, lectures - women. Books, I am sure, too, women buy more. I am the same myself. Even five years ago, I can not imagine myself without the constant training. Went for trainings, seminars, I read a bunch of books on development. In this case, I really did not have time to read fiction as if it - it is useless time spent. All the time I was studying somewhere. Improve their skills in psychology, was looking for a new flaws, I worked with them. Generally constantly working on yourself.

This gave fruit. But.

Among other things it is constantly kept me in a state of added stress. I compare myself with those others. It seemed to me that here I do not hold out, and there could have been improved. I could not accept myself such as I am. I could not relax completely. And now I understand that as long as the woman is tense, she can not be happy.

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Happiness in this world comes through relaxation, rather than through the tension.  

Driving "lift a weight - stiffened - and happy" - not ours. This is the male version of life, the male version of happiness. Because men punctually perform feats. Ilya Muromets - sometimes lie on the stove for some time, power saving up, and then - bang! - and all won. Sometimes a man can earn his entire monthly income for one day, and then again to lie down on the stove. The result is in fact received, super-efforts are made.

Women's life is different. We do not live in a point, we - in the stream. We have every second with their actions and thoughts are creating your world and the present. All of our duties - a process that has no end in sight. Whether it's cleaning, laundry or own beauty. Any result of our work a short time. Therefore, if you focus on it and do it every time march, you can very quickly overstrain.

You can drive themselves into the rigid framework around the clock ideal order. You can try to build itself into an army discipline. You can make super-efforts. But why? After all, we are developing in order to be happy. And whether making such stress us happier?
To live stream, you must first be relaxed. Flexible. Easily integrated in any circumstances. To be able to take - and so good, and so good too. Be alive. Be plastic. Adaptive. That in any circumstances, be yourself, stay true to yourself - and still feel happiness.

Here in this we need to develop - to relax. Relax, take, be flexible, be yourself and true to herself.  

And learn to be happy in any weather. Is this a simple problem? And is it possible to learn it from books? Is any book written by a hundred percent it is about you? You will in any case it is necessary to adapt it for yourself, try and experiment.

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Do I have to do to read books and go to training? Can. Why yes - despite what the purpose of the book or training. Do I have to listen to lectures? Can. Especially if all this teaches you to relax and helps to feel happy.

It is possible, but not necessarily. It is not necessary.  

So many years, women have lived without it and did not suffer. It's a boy with five years gave the teachers that they were driven, and knowledge, and discipline. Girls do head knowledge not scored. Leaving them free to head to keep them feminine lightness and plasticity.
The best development for women - in front of your eyes. At home. In the mirror. As your loved ones.

Relations can not be learned from books or seminars. You can take for yourself some methods, techniques. You can (and are perhaps even necessary) to dismantle some old blockages in his heart. But you can learn to relations within relationships. Sometimes filling the cones, making their conclusions. Recognizing himself and the man who next to you. Adjusting to a specific person, rather than a set of rules. Reaching a compromise and harmony - inside and in the outside world. Harmony rather than perfection.

Let's develop properly, like a woman!  

It seems to me that all this word for us is written with the letter "e" - flutter! Flutter in the wind, on a swing, while dancing, while walking, rustling skirts, platishko, handkerchiefs, waving his long hair, dispel bad thoughts in my head and severity of the heart, to dispel the fog of doubts and contradictions, to dispel his bad mood, dispel, finally!

Let us leave the development in the usual sense of the men, even if they do penance, super-efforts, feats and victories over ourselves. Let their companion will and self-discipline, and rigor, let them become tougher, stronger, tougher, hardier. We somehow all this why? Tough can not be flexible, strong and can not be relaxed.

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Let's still going to fly, instead of develop. It will benefit all of us.

Olga Valyaeva



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